Hey there, normal people!
It’s been a while and I am still here, daydreaming about a Parisian lifestyle while vicariously living that fantasy through vlogs and voraciously listening to curated Spotify playlists, with names such as ‘manifesting sitting in a Parisian cafe’ and ‘hot girl running around Paris’ etc.
I wake up some mornings and I have the urge to romanticise the shit out of my life - reading books with a pencil in my hand, oil painting, spending hours on end on Pinterest, clicking zoomed-in pictures of every little thing that I find interesting. Universe, if you’re listening, I’d really love a film camera and a Kodak gold.
I also have been noticing myself developing this intense urge to embody and give into my feminine self. Not to sound like a sickly Victorian woman, but I think a trip to the sea might solve all my problems and soothe my aching heart that yearns for a life my own self is living in a parallel universe. She’s probably looking at me through the stack of books atop a gilded shelf in her living room and trying to communicate through to me via my less glamorous one. On the topic of realising my most feminine self, I feel attracted to creative energy - it has ebbed and flowed through me over the weeks and brought with it a lot of emotions. Be that as it may, I’m learning to regulate them more and better than ever before. I have been religiously using my ‘How We Feel’ app to check in with myself and giving mental and temporal energy to habits like journaling because they’re turning into tools that are less guilt-inducing for missing them and more practical aids in times of emotional upheaval.
These days, I’ve also been consuming culture and extremely mindlessly too. If it’s art - I’m there. I’m letting the sunsets pass by quickly but nights through me, slowly. Sometimes, I don’t know what I want and the next moment, I have a million things in my list that I get overwhelmed. Although that’s the case, a lot of these million things are attainable, and they’re materialising doggedly.
Rains have taken over Hyderabad skies and I have been sleeping in late, cuddling with my whale soft toy. Spending a lot of time with family but I genuinely miss having friends close to me geographically and meeting them much more frequently than once in three weeks. I am looking forward to that changing soon - N is visiting Hyderabad and we’ll all reunite to spend a weekend together, hopefully without the rain turning into a storm. Excitement abounds in Bangalore and I would like to visit the place to boot. Soon.
I’ll write to you again. Au revoir!
Yours,
Naya
Some developments :)
I’ve almost perfected the micro-makeup look and being a person who likes to keep it natural and doesn’t want to put a tonne of layers on my face - it makes me glad.
Reading The Lord of the Rings - The Two Towers. Visited an enchanting bookstore - Luna Books and sat on the grass in the middle of a work day and watched a cow grazing.